The Amazing Criswell

Criswell started by selling vitamins on local L.A. TV stations, but soon wowed 1950s America with his amazing psychic predictions! His powers earned him appearances on the Jack Paar show, national syndication, and Mae West as a homie.

He famously predicted that Denver would be struck by a space ray that would turn all metal to rubber (causing total calamity at amusement parks), and that the world would end in mass cannibalism on Aug. 18, 1999. He also predicted that JFK would not run for re-election because something was going to happen to him in November 1963.

As you can see, his hair was just as amazing as his mighty mental prowess! He also slept in a coffin.

P.S. Thanks to my co-worker Becky for “loaning” me her pen.

The Amazing Criswell

Published in: on August 14, 2007 at 2:44 pm  Comments (3)  

3 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. I ate a baby on August 17, 1999, but besides a Triscuit, that pretty much held me over until the 19th. Psychic my ass.

  2. In 1999, I remember checking out this hot babe and thinking about how yummy and delicious she was, while simultaneously experiencing a powerful sense of impending doom. Does that count?

  3. I sleep in a sarcophugus.

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